A friend on Facebook: “You can learn everything you need to know about someone just watching them purchase fireworks.”
One summer, my best friend and I were too poor to buy fireworks, but we loved window shopping at the firework stand. The dudebro attendants noticed us and offered us a deal: take stacks of their flyers, distribute them far and wide on our bikes, and they’d give us $100 worth of store credit. Deal! We took off and papered Anaheim with their ads going door-to-door.
Hours later, we returned. And were laughed at by the same guys: sorry, dudes, you should have gotten it in writing, sucks to be you!
My friend and I moped around my house, crushed. My father noticed and asked what’s going on.
He went to the fireworks stand and returned with $100 worth of fireworks.
I learned everything I needed to know about my dad from watching him “purchase” those fireworks.